
How time flies so fast! My daughter is now in kindergarten and by next year, she will be in first grade. Wow! I could not imagine myself yet having a grade schooler. It kinda makes me feel a little old.
It was her first day of school last Tuesday. So, I brought her to school together with my mother-in-law and my son. I went down the car and accompanied her to the main entrance of CSC which was packed with yayas and mostly mothers. The place was so hot because it was too crowded. There were parents who, like me, were excited to see their child go back to school. So when we reached the main entrance, Coleen got her lunch box and plastic bag from me and said, “Goodbye mommy, I love you!” I replied her with a hug and said,“I love you too, baby!” So I finally let go of her hand and watched her be escorted by the assistants
to her teacher. Then, I looked for a space among the sea of heads that surrounded me where I could still watch my daughter from afar. I tried to squeeze in
“Oh, why are you crying?
“Don’t leave me, mommy!” she cried as she was trying to escape from the arms of the lady guard who was trying to block her way towards me. “I’m not leaving you. I’ll just be here. I will wait for you to go inside, baby.” I tried to console her but it didn’t work. She hugged me tightly as if she wanted to squish my legs. So I bent down and said, “Don’t cry baby girl. It’s OK. You said you miss school, right? So now you are going back to school so please stop crying.”
“But I don’t want you to go, Mommy! Just stay here! Don’t leave me!” I hugged her and assured her that I will be there waiting for her until she leaves their waiting area. So, eventually, she stopped crying and went straight to her teacher and new classmates. As I was standing behind the gate, I saw her looking at me with a sad face. I thought to myself, “Why did she cry?What could be the real reason? She should not be crying anymore.” Then, the bell rang and all the kids stood up and started their short exercise before going to the lunchroom. I looked back at her to see if she was following her teacher. She was, hesitantly. Then, they left for the lunchroom.
I am just surprised that lately, my Coleen has been suffering with separation anxiety. I thought all the while, she has already adjusted to her school. Well, maybe since we transferred her to afternoon session, everything seems new again. Good thing she has one classmate from nursery that also transferred to the afternoon session which made her a bit more comfortable.
Haaay. I sometimes feel pressured or feel scared whether I am on the right track when it comes to parenting. Well, I still consider myself a new learner. I learn each day and I try to remember all the things I need to remember in disciplining and making my kids feel safe and secure. Good luck to me! 
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